One rape

Today I sent out a message to those who care to read, all users on the work email and facebook friends. This was the message;

"South Africa is a nation that needs collective healing. This is not only the government's job but each of us as we engage with each other every day. We need to turn the tide. Smile at the guy selling newspapers at the traffic lights, people need to be treated like human beings in order to be human. Do not be rude and cause a scene just because the opportunity has arisen. Rise above, become another person's breath of fresh air. Kindness experienced today can affect future behaviour. Be the source of that kindness, that compassion and that love, that is a luxury to some."

A friend asked what prompted this message my response was the following;

" Everyone is up in arms about the girl who was raped and mutilated this week. We have 16days of activism against violence against women and children etc. People are calling for castration, death penalty etc. Next week the topic will be forgotten. We will be outraged by something else.

The thing is everyday a potential rapist is born, that same potential rapist is a potential good doctor, good father, good president. Somewhere along the way a series of things happen I will leave this to the psychologists, sociologists and anthropologists to debate over, but these things happen as inputs into this little boy’s life that make him become one or the other. In the incident in question there was not only one victim. The victims are the girl who died suffered what we will never know because we will never be her, a group of men, whose pain, need for recognition, need for power, need for dignity, need to feel like men at whatever cost, this need so big that they could gather voluntarily and commit this crime are victims, they will never shake this off their conscience and they must continue to live, dare I say, society which must now read this in the media are victims, we are witnessing the lowest levels to which humanity can sink being humans ourselves.

In Limpompo province there have already been 121 REPORTED rape cases this year of only 39days so far! I believe prevention is the key and I believe, love and kindness are powerful ways in which a largely helpless group of good people can impact the society in which we live. Little boys must be taken care of. Grown men must be taken care of. The mothers that look after children must be taken care of etc. Women and little girls must be taken care of. If you do not have a rapist there is no need to discuss whether we should castrate or kill them. Is a smile at the traffic lights going to solve the world’s problems? I actually think it might soften the heart a little, give a bit of that dignity and recognition that might otherwise be taken by force."

There is a place for the right judicial system, counselling services, community projects, marches and other forms of active activism. I support, respect and am in awe of people who dedicate their lives to fight the scourges in society while we smell the roses. I also think that, it not just for us to sit and be victims but for us to turn the tide in our own little way every day. Let us give the recognition of dignity one to another a try.   

Beyond tribal

We must realise that we have greater enemies than the tribe next door. These are primarily HIV, lack of education, poverty, environmental degradation and what I call continental pillaging. Development calls for us to rise above personal, historical, environmental or genetic circumstance. We must forget the smaller divisions. We need to unify, become beyond tribal, become African, then walk with pride as global citizens.

Development in Africa - Questions on buildings

The concept of development in Africa conjures up images that are interesting to scrutinize. There is the usual before and after picture that we come across consistently. We appear happy to see images of what was once dry, "barren", bush with the odd acacia tree here and there, suddenly replaced by images of the most basic of buildings usually painted khaki or green or shades of brown. Why the khaki or dull green paint? Is it a theme hanging over from the usual military struggles that are in the history of most Africa countries? That history etched in most of our flags constantly brought to our attention by our leaders who were in "the struggle"? Is it  perhaps so that the wear and tear that appears to be inevitable will not be as apparent as quickly as had the walls been painted white or baby blue? Is it perhaps because there are not enough women making the decisions on what colour paint to buy or enough women envisioned to be empowered to manage the projects from the onset? Do we dare build beautiful structures with big windows and plant flowers outside them as a sign that we are committed to the daily maintenance and nurturing of this project? Is it impractical to add a little beauty there because it will shortly be dilapidated? What are our chances of success if we plan dilapidation into the projects even as we begin them? Is it that external changes bring about internal changes or is it that internal changes bring about external changes? Why don't we plant some flowers at the development project site and measure the success of the project and the efficiency of the management team on the state of the flowers outside. Think on it.